in sickness and in health

I was quite the sight to behold on Monday morning. I was sick. I was tired. I had bags under my eyes. I was wearing the same pajamas I'd worn all day on Sunday and I hadn't taken a shower since Saturday morning. My hair was up in a slept-in ponytail. You know what I'm talking about - kind of bunched up at top with the stringy strands falling oh so gracefully around my face. And just like icing on top of a beautiful cake, I had fresh spit up running down my left shoulder. I was changing Jude's diaper and he was screaming loudly - although I was in that sick person zombie trance that causes everything around you to be very, very fuzzy- so his screaming wasn't particularly bothering me. In case you need a visual, I looked something like this:



This was the sight upon which Shawn walked this past Monday morning. My sweet, dear husband only said, "I think you should call the Doctor today."

I was sick this past weekend, and let me assure you that it is not easy being sick and taking care of an infant. Thankfully, Shawn made me take a trip to the Doctor on Monday morning (I thought for sure it was just a very nasty cold that I'd get over), where I guess I was diagnosed with a respiratory infection...she was kind of vague. All that mattered to me, though, was that she was prescribing antibiotics which would hopefully equal health soon! I've been on the antibiotic for 24 hours now, and I feel pretty much back to normal. I'm now just waiting for the inevitable sickness of my husband and child, which promises to be even less fun than being sick myself. Oh well, I suppose it had to happen at some point, huh? I'm very grateful for my amazing husband who took care of the house, made me hot tea, and forced my stubborn butt to the Doctor's office.

On a much, much better note, I am very excited to announce that Jude has slept through the night for almost two weeks now. I hesitated posting this information on the blog because I had this weird notion that as soon as I put my excitement in writing, he would go right back to sleeping three or four hours. So - if we have a rough night tonight - just know that I will place the blame on you, the reader of this blog. It would appear that while Jude is very sweet natured, he also has a stubborn streak and when he decides he's going to do something, he does it! At his age, "sleeping through the night," is usually characterized by six or seven hours...eight if you're a lucky duck. Jude sleeps for about ten and a half hours and goes about twelve hours between feedings. So if his last feeding was at 7:30pm (as it usually is), I can expect him to wake up between 7:00 and 7:30am the next morning. He started doing this the night before I started back to work, as if to say, "Mommy probably needs some rest now, I think I'll start sleeping through the night." Whatever the case, we were very excited and you can bet that my butt is in bed by at least 11:00pm every night so I can get a full, glorious eight hours.

And on an even better note still, Shawn and I are headed up to Ohio this weekend for a quick trip to see his family! Since the Steelers are in the SuperBowl, Shawn apparently has what I can only describe as a man-need to watch the game with like-minded fans. When the Steelers were last in the SuperBowl, we watched the game in our apartment in North Carolina and made pierogis (It's basically potato stuffed pasta. I've learned that the people in Shawn's hometown area can do amazing things with potatoes). I did my best to be enthusiastic about the game, but it was probably evident that my knowledge about football is marginal. I take that back - I actually know quite a bit, I just don't care about football all that much. Still - I tried to get riled up for Shawn's sake. So after watching the Steelers in the SuperBowl with me, Shawn's rightly deduced that it would be much more fun to watch the game with his family. I can't necessarily understand this man-need of his, but I'm all for it since it means time with family! I'm excited for Jude to meet his Aunts Aubrey and Heather and his cousins...and maybe to even see snow! I'm a little nervous about driving so long with a potentially screamy, fussy infant, but the excitement of getting to see Shawn's family far outweighs any crying we might have to endure!

Grammy and Aunt Rachael's visit!

My mom and sister decided to come down for a few days to visit with the newest addition to the Pohlman family! They ventured from the ice covered roads of Indiana, through the snow covered mountains of West Virginia, and ever so thoughtfully brought that cold air with them! They had to cut their trip short because of predicted icy roads on the way back, but I absolutely loved having them here. Both Shawn and I have always been thoroughly independent and neither of us have had a difficult time with moving away from our families...until now. I miss our families - particularly my mom - and am on a campaign to get my parents and siblings to move down here. :) So far, no luck! My sister was the first of Jude's aunts or uncles for him to meet. Mom and Rachael watched Jude one night while Shawn and I had a date, and Rach said Jude looked at her like, "You kind of look like my Mommy. You kind of sound like my Mommy - but something is just not quite right."

Actually, I realized for the first time that Jude knows me, he actually knows me. When my Mom held him and I was talking, Jude turned his head to see where I was. If he was crying in the stroller, my face calmed him down (for about two seconds - until he remembered that he was mad again). What a great feeling to see that he knows my voice and recognizes my face!

I haven't taken Jude out a whole lot beyond a quick trip between his feedings - it's always seemed like it's not worth the nightmare of timing his feedings/finding a place to feed him/deal with his crying in public, etc. It's tough enough to get our butts to church every Sunday in one piece, and I just haven't really wanted to venture out for an entire day. I figured that I may as well take the leap while I had Mom and Rachael with me to help. So we did a day of shopping! I used our stroller for the first time, which was surprisingly easy to use. I nursed and changed Jude in the nursing room at the mall (thanks to Shantel - I would've never known there was a nursing room at the mall!), which was also surprisingly easy. The only real difficulty was calming Jude down when he started fussing in a store. This wasn't such a big deal in the mall - it was loud enough that he wasn't a huge bother to others, and I could easily take him out of stores. When he started crying at Starbucks and Edward McKay's however, I had to deal with dirty looks from annoyed people. It was freezing outside, so I couldn't take him out of the store until he fell asleep. Any advice on how to deal with an infant's melt down in public?

My mom also got to witness Jude's first forays into splashing in the tub! Shawn's been trying to teach him to splash for weeks, and Jude finally figured out how to splash with his legs - and boy was he pleased! His little frog legs were going wild in the tub and his eyes got big as he realized how much fun it was! The visit from Mom and Rachael went by all together too quickly, and I was sad to see them have to leave. I'm looking forward, though, to visiting with them again in May. I wish I had some great pictures to share with you, but I was so wrapped up in visiting that I completely forgot to whip out the camera. Next time, I promise!

we have smiles!

Jude is getting this smiling thing down pat! Good thing, too - he's got a cute one. His favorite toy right now is his Baby Einstein playmat, so I thought I'd include a few pictures of him smiling there.

That baby in the mirror IS pretty funny.

I've begun playing a game with Jude that results in huge smiles from both of us. It involves Jude laying on his back while I put my face close enough to his that he can reach out and touch me. Jude kicks his little legs and swings his little hands until he can figure out how to touch my mouth, which is when I basically smother his hand in kisses. While he hasn't made much of a noise yet, he throws his head back and the smiles pretty much overtake his face. Go ahead and make fun, but seriously - it's the best fifteen minutes of my day.

Along those same lines, he's getting better about learning hand/eye coordination and is getting pretty good at reaching what he's trying to get. Shawn will set Jude on his lap and put his hand out, palm up - slightly to the left of Jude. Jude will reach out and "high-five" Shawn. Then Shawn will put his right hand up, and after a few tries, Jude will high-five Shawn's right hand. He'll keep switching hands for a good ten to fifteen minutes and Jude will eventually get to where he can get the switched hand the first time. I think that kind of coordination might be a little bit advanced for his age, but I'm not sure.

I seem to have a lot of people asking me how cloth diapering is going lately. My theory is that they thought we'd give up after a month, so they're asking to see if they were right. I'm pretty proud to report that cloth diapering is still going really well. Jude is in cloth diapers all the time except at night (so we don't have to change him in the middle of the night, hopefully encouraging him to sleep through the night) and occasionally when we're out (though we're keeping him in cloth more and more even in those cases). In his two months of life, we've had to buy one pack of newborn diapers. Right now, he's in size One diapers and we've been using the same pack for at least two weeks now- and we're only halfway through it. You can imagine that my thrifty little heart just beams at those savings! Because he's also not using formula, the only thing we buy on a regular basis for him is wipes. We bought an economy pack several weeks ago, but once we go through those, I think I might try to make wipes. You can bet that Shawn will think I'm crazy for doing so, but he's always excited about the money I'm able to save. I've not found that washing the diapers is particularly annoying, at least not yet. They wash completely clean (the poo of breastfed babies is water soluble, so it just dissolves and there's no trace of poop in the washing machine at all - I promise!) and since it's been too rainy to hang them up outside, I hang them on the back of our kitchen chairs for a few hours and they're good to go. At this point, I think I wash diapers twice a week - though I think that will lessen once he's big enough to be in the diapers Mama and Papa Maurer bought him, we have several more of those than we have of the ones I made.

I'm also extremely proud to report that breastfeeding is going well. It really did get ten times easier at six weeks, and seems to only get less painful as each week passes. I think my biggest complaint right now is that I'm not getting much sleep. A couple of times a week, Shawn will feed him a bottle of pumped milk so that I can sleep a bit longer in the mornings, but I'm still operating on about four (he DID sleep for six hours two nights in a row and we're working on getting back to that schedule) hours of sleep a night. Let me clarify - I know this is a lot more than many moms of infants this age are getting. I'm grateful for the sleep that I do get, but two months of sleep deprivation can get to a girl! My friend Monica told me that she made it through her daughter's first three months of life by repeating the mantra, "To everything there is a season, and this too shall pass." While I love everything else about this stage, I've found myself repeating Monica's mantra to myself on many a sleepless night. Soon enough, he'll be sleeping through the night, and all I'll remember about this stage was the first smiles he shared with me.

While I'm completely rambling, can I just say how much more respect I have for mothers of boys? I was so frustrated with Jude one night - all he wanted to do was be held and cuddled by me, and all I wanted to do was be held and cuddled by my pillow and blankets. I couldn't imagine why the heck he wanted to be held so badly. My mind suddenly flashed forward to thirteen years from now when this same little boy will utter a grumpy "fine," in response to my queries about school that day and jet straight to his stinky teenage boy bedroom, only to emerge for dinner three hours later. I felt Jude's one arm around my neck, and the other arm securely tucked under his body. I felt his feet curled up tightly and listened to his breathing. I was reminded that he wanted to be held because he felt safe with his Mom. Realistically, I only have a few more years of cuddling my son before he morphs into an independent little man. I look forward to seeing him becoming a man, I look forward to watching his relationship with Shawn grow, and I look forward to helping him learn the difference between real men and adult males who act like boys. I genuinely do look forward to him maturing, but for now...my little boy needs me.

I make him feel safe. And I will not take that for granted.

cradle c"r"ap

I had written about Jude's fascination and ongoing conversations with the sign above his changing table. I thought you'd like to see how animated he is -

His little arms and legs go crazy when he's smiling at his sign.

"Oh sign, only you understand me."

Jude had his two month well check-up today! This check up included the dreaded shots, and I found myself a little anxious as we left for the appointment. He was weighed first (10 lbs, 4 oz), measured (21.5 inches), and his head circumference was measured (15 something inches, I think). Our doctor told us that Jude's in the 25th percentile for his height and weight (he's in normal range and most breastfed babies are in the lower percentiles until they start solid food).

His head, however, is in the 75th percentile. Dr. Rogers assured us that this is also absolutely normal and looks great. You have to realize, however, that Shawn has been making fun of me for my big head since we've been dating. His amusement was further fueled when he saw toddler pictures of me and realized that I've always had a rather large head. Please know that his jokes are completely out of love and that I don't take them personally - I suppose my head IS pretty roundish. That being said - Shawn has been telling Jude for weeks now that he has his mother's head. It would appear that Shawn was right! Personally, I think toddlers with large heads are adorable. :)

Jude also has something funky going on with his belly button - I think it's a herniated belly button, actually. The doctor said that's perfectly normal and that it'll end up being an innie. In the meantime, it's kind of like a thermometer...the more angry he gets the more it pokes straight out! Since it's nothing serious, it's pretty amusing to us.

I suppose I should explain why I've titled this blog Cradle Crap, huh? As of late, Jude's developed a case of cradle cap, which is just basically baby dandruff and is pretty typical in infants. Perhaps it's my lack of sleep...perhaps it's pregnancy brain still run amuck...perhaps I'm just a doofus...but I cannot seem to say "Cradle Cap." No matter how hard I try, "Cradle Crap" is what comes out! Ah well - the doctor says baby oil and baby shampoo should take care of it. ;)

At the end of the visit, the time for Jude's shots had come. I let Shawn take Jude, watch him get stuck, and comfort him - I knew I'd probably cry just as hard as Jude if I did it. We were actually pretty surprised with how well Jude did. He cried a heartbreaking cry at first, but calmed down pretty quickly! He even has adorable Garfield bandaids to prove just how brave he was.

christmas, birthday, and new year's craziness

Thanks to all of you who are continuing to follow our journey from pregnancy to parenthood. I'm so sorry to have to move this blog from it's other location, but I desperately did not want to lose all of the posts I wrote as they contain so many memories for our family. As I was transferring all of those posts to this site, Shawn and I found ourselves fondly remembering some of the things we had completely forgotten about in our pregnancy. Seeing the positive on the pregnancy test seems like so long ago already!

Likewise, it seems as though every week since Jude's been born has flown by. I'm sorry that it's taken me awhile to update, we've had a lot going on around the Maurer house lately! So let's start with Christmas. Christmas Eve was a restful day for Shawn and I...we did our best to relax and really enjoy spending the holiday with our son. I made my Mom's world famous carmel corn, we had some egg nog, went to Pinedale's Christmas Eve service, and Shawn read "The Polar Express" to Jude for his bedtime story. After we put Jude down to sleep, Shawn and I enjoyed our carmel corn and watched "The Polar Express" together. Soon enough, we look forward to camping out in the living room to watch Christmas specials with our kid(s).

Jude getting ready for the Christmas Eve service in his cute new Christmas outfit.

...sleeping in heavenly peace

When we took his sweater off, he looked kind of like a native american warrior
Shawn reading Jude his Christmas Eve bedtime story

Shawn let me sleep in a little bit on Christmas morning and woke up to feed Jude his first morning feeding (which is usually anywhere between 6:00 and 7:00am). I woke up to feed Jude around 9:30am, we had breakfast as a family, and then it was time to get down to the present opening business! I had expected Jude to either sleep or cry through the opening of the presents, but he actually played contentedly on his Baby Einstein playmat. Shawn and I took turns opening his presents and showing them to Jude, who...to be quite honest...was a little more interested in his flashy star. Nonetheless, we had a blast opening his gifts! Jude (i.e. Shawn) especially loved his new Steelers jacket and warm up pants! It'll balance out his Bengals onsie nicely. :) Jude also got several adorable little outifts, some great toys, an umbrella stroller, a couple of very thoughtful books, a homemade hat, and several other thoughtful gifts for which we're so grateful.

Our little elf on Christmas morning.

My Christmas present to myself was getting to dress him up in this ridiculous, but oh-so-adorable Christmas day outift!

We had so much fun opening Jude's presents and can't thank our friends and family enough for thoroughly spoiling our son on his first Christmas! After we opened presents, I went for a run, and we enjoyed our sunny and warm North Carolina weather! We had dinner and then drove Jude around to look at Christmas lights (well, he slept in his carseat...but Shawn and I enjoyed the lights!).

My 27th birthday was December 30th, which seemed to sneak up on me this year. That morning, Shawn woke up early with Jude again, allowing me to get about six straight hours of sleep. Once I woke up, we went to breakfast at IHOP together, and Shawn headed into work while I enjoyed hanging out with Jude. We asked a friend from church to watch Jude for a few hours and Shawn and I enjoyed a much needed date! We had dinner at Noma, a new restaurant downtown, got some coffee, and walked around a bookstore for a little bit. I missed Jude terribly and was excited to head back home to see him, but I cannot express how refreshing it was to my heart to spend time away from being a Mom and enjoy being a Wife. I smiled and giggled and danced and bopped (yes, bopped), all of which seem like rare occurances when mixed in with diaper changes, the race to catch a few hours of sleep, dealing with screaming fits, and all of the other insanities of motherhood. After spending time alone with my sweet husband, I came home incredibly eager to see, hold, and kiss Jude!

Since we've been dating, Shawn and I typically go out for my birthday and stay in for New Year's, and this year was no exception! We enjoyed a slow paced, semi-restful night at home - watching movies and loving on our son. Jude went to bed around 9:30, but Shawn and I actually stayed up to say good-bye to 2008 and welcome 2009. So that, my friends, concludes our holiday craziness wrap up! Our holidays were especially meaningful this year, and I pray that you likewise enjoyed time with your loved ones!

December

12/10/08

our sweet baby boy...
I've kind of been putting off posting again because 1)Any spare time has been taken up with either sleeping, housework, or quality time with Shawn, and 2)I really have no idea where to start! Obviously our lives have changed drastically in the last month, and everyday seems to present its own ups and downs. If you talk to me one day, you'll probably get the sense that I'm chronically exhausted, frustrated, and at my wits end. Talk to me the next day, and I'll brag about how I got four straight hours of sleep, have been able to keep up with the house, and how great I feel.
But let me get to what I know is far more interesting to all of you (and me!). And that would be Jude, of course. :) Shawn and I have absolutely loved discovering his personality and figuring out how to be good parents to him. He's adorable, sweet, fiesty, and very, very alert. He seems to be pretty advanced for his age - rolling over already, focusing on objects well, grasping for hanging toys (and sometimes reaching them!), pushing himself up on his arms when he's on his tummy, holding his head up for 10 seconds at a time, and putting some of his weight on his straightened out legs. Of course, we think this is the most amazing thing in the world, but my rational self knows that all babies develop at their own rate and ours...while amazing...will most likely not be walking in the next week. ;)
We had some difficulties with getting Jude to sleep for several weeks - it seemed like he always, always, always had to fuss himself to sleep. He'd be exhausted (as would we!), and we would have tried absolutely everything to calm him down. However, he'd sleep only when he cried himself to the point of sheer exhaustion. We started letting him cry it out a little (which was a tough decision for me, especially at such a young age), and within a few days he could sleep in his crib with relative ease. He still has his rough days and nights, but overall it is getting easier. I'm learning that he's pretty sensitive to both sound and lights and will become more agitated if he's sleepy and is around a lot of noise (ie...the TV, a lot of people talking loudly, etc.). I'm not a big fan of shutting down the world just because your child is sleeping, so I tried to get him used to napping with noise, but have realized that he just sleeps better with the blinds drawn and relative quiet around him.
I'm also not a fan of sheltering your child from germs and thought I'd be even a bit aggressive about exposing Jude to germs...especially since he won't be in daycare. My thoughts were that I wanted to expose him to germs early so that he didn't encounter a ton of germs in pre-school and have to miss often. And once more, I have to eat my words about the kind of mother I thought I'd be! It turns out that Jude was born right at the beginning of cold/flu season, and it also turns out that if a newborn gets the cold or flu, it can be highly dangerous.
So, it's true...I've turned into that obnoxious mother who asks people to squirt Purell before handling their baby. I've learned that there is a time to expose your child to germs, and next year I will not be nearly as paranoid...but his immune system is not ready to handle this winter's germs and I'm realizing that I need to protect him as much as possible for now. I'm not ready to see Jude in the hospital with RSV or pneumonia...so hand santizer is our best friend!
Jude's been doing great with nursing. He's officially been a breastfed baby for a month now, which is exciting. It's not always been easy, but I've been told that if you can make it to 6 weeks then it becomes like second nature, so that is my goal (well, my ultimate goal is 9 months, or whenever he moves to solely solid food)! I love his little fat rolls that he has under his neck and on his arms. I love what Shawn calls his 'thunder thighs,' and I love that he recently put on a third chin. I love seeing him grow and knowing that God made my body capable of nourishing him -both in and out of my womb. He was gaining weight like a champ at his 2 week appointment, and I'm eager to see how his weight gain is looking at this 2 month appointment.
As you can see, I could write about this kid for hours, but it's getting close to Jude's time to eat. I'll do my best to post a little more often, but I have to be honest - if I have a choice between catching a nap or posting...I'm taking that nap!! :)

12/17/08

the sweetest sound...
Jude laughed the other day! I've been watching him constantly for signs of a smile that wouldn't be attributed to gas, so imagine my surprise when I not just saw a smile, but heard the sweetest "uh-UH!" that accompanied that smile. While short, I am nonetheless claiming that adorable little sound as an official laugh. What made our sweet little boy laugh, you may wonder? Well, Jude loves his changing table. Shawn and I have no idea what is so magical about it, but he's rarely fussy and loves to lay there and kick his arms and legs, surveying the world around him. Hanging right above the changing table is a brown sign with white words that read, "Peace, Love, Baby," by which Jude is fascinated. I've read that infants are drawn to starkly contrasting colors, so I assume that would be why he could stare at that picture all day long. Or perhaps he's contemplating the deeper meaning of those words...I guess we'll never know. At any rate, Jude's laugh was most decidedly directed toward his old friend, the Peace Love Baby sign. I'm trying to not be too jealous of the sign, and I tell myself that soon enough his laughter will be directed towards a funny face I make or an impression that Daddy does. For now, though, that changing table and esoteric sign are hilarious to my five week old.
Speaking of which, is it crazy to anyone else that Jude is already five weeks old? I tried to weigh him this morning (I weighed myself, then weighed myself holding him and subtracted the difference...not the most scientific method, but I have a hard time seeing his growth since I'm with him 24/7 and just needed some reassurance). According to our home scale, the kid weighs 9 pounds! He's getting good at rolling from his stomach to his back, but hasn't attempted the back to stomach feat yet. He's also holding his head up on his own for several minutes at a time. To my sheer pleasure, he's only waking up once (around 2:00 or 3:00am) to eat at night! This might mistakenly lead you to think that I'm getting lots of sleep, but don't be fooled. He takes until about 11:00pm to eat, and then feels the need to wail until about midnight. Still, just one night feeding is impressive for his age.
Now that Jude's outgrown the disposable newborn diapers we had, we're transitioning him to cloth diapers, which is going great! I still keep him in disposables at night and if we're going out, but he wears mostly cloth during the day. His little butt is at least two times bigger as compared to when he wears disposables, and he looks absolutely adorable! He had a pretty bad diaper rash that I couldn't get rid of - no matter how much cream I lathered on, that went away within two or three days of him wearing the cloth diapers. Right now, the extra laundry isn't too much of a pain in the butt, but I might be singing a different tune once I go back to work.
I think he's waking up from his nap, so mommyhood calls.

12/22/08

pictures!...
We were recently told about an acquaintance who wanted to broaden her photographic skills and needed some experience with an infant. Since we just so happened to have an infant on hand, we offered him up! She got some great shots of him, and Jude so kindly gave her the full infant experience (he peed on her blanket, needed to eat about halfway through, and cried for about forty-five minutes!). The photographer didn't charge us at all, and even uploaded the pictures to an online gallery and will be giving us a CD of all the pictures she took. Rather than trying to get the pictures uploaded on an album here, I thought I'd just post a link. You have the permission of the photographer to download/print/replicate the pictures as you wish!
http://gallery.me.com/flygirl76#100375

12/23/08

postpartum update...
So today is a big day! Jude is officially six weeks old, and I am officially six weeks postpartum...cheers all around! I have an appointment today, at which I'm hoping to be told that I am in the clear to exercise and once again -live a normal life! I have to confess, however, that I have gone running twice. I took it easy and only ran for three sets of five minutes, and my goodness, how great it felt! I seriously almost cried the first time I ran. I've been feeling a little bit down lately, and it was so wonderful and energizing to be out in the cool air, staring at the sky, and feeling the wind. It felt great to move my body again and not have to worry about my heart rate. I'm really, really looking forward to running on a consistent basis once again and am already looking to see when I could run a 5K again.
We had a rough several days with Jude, but he seems to be coming out of that. I think he was going through a growth spurt and he was eating every two hours...even throughout the night...and fussing a lot more than normal. I can't tell you how many times it got to 3:00am in the morning, and I seriously contemplated just giving up breastfeeding and doing formula. Thankfully, I didn't give in and he seems to be through his growth spurt and back to his 3 hour feeding schedule during the day and 4-5 hour schedule at night. In desperation, I actually called the lactation consultant from the hospital and was able to get some answers to a few questions I had. First of all, I found out that the 45 minutes to an hour it was taking me to nurse him didn't need to be that long. The LC said he could get everything he needed in 20-30 minutes. It's SO nice to not have to take an hour to nurse him everytime! 30 minutes seems like a breeze in comparison! I also found out that I have quite a bit of milk, judging by the color of Jude's poop (this disclaimer might be a little late, but if discussion about poop color and breastfeeding gross you out -skip down to the next paragraph). Basically, he wasn't getting enough hindmilk. So I now know that he only needs to feed on one side per feeding. This was a huge relief because I think every nursing mother worries that she doesn't have enough milk and her infant is starving. I was also being super paranoid about making sure I pumped every time he had a bottle so that my body would keep my milk supply adequate. While that's still a good idea if possible, it turns out that my plethora of milk would allow me to skip that occasionally (because I'm sound asleep, hopefully!) and not mess with my milk supply. Hooray! And finally, I learned that the hospital has a nursing mother's support group every other Thursday. I found a local La Leche League group, but they only meet one Wednesday a month, and I just haven't been able to attend. I'm seriously thinking about attending the Nursing Mother's group. I like that it's twice a month and since I'll be working from home on Thursdays, I'll be able to attend the group long-term. Even with the recent chaos of a growth spurt, nursing is going really well and definitely HAS gotten easier!
Jude is smiling a little bit more often and is able to play for longer periods of time by himself (15-20 minutes instead of 5-10). He actually smiled at me quite a bit this morning, which was the best thing in the world!
Shawn and I are really looking forward to our first Christmas with Jude! Thanks to friends and family who love him so much, underneath our tree is filled with presents for the kid! We've shown him snow on TV, and have told him that he probably won't ever see it in North Carolina, but that we promise that he'll get to see it when we travel for Thanksgiving. :) In the past couple of weeks, we've begun a bedtime routine of either giving him a bath or a baby massage, and then reading a book to him, swaddling him, praying with/for him, and then laying him down in his crib. Shawn's been reading Jude from Luke 2 about Jesus' birth. Perhaps it's just happenstance, but he seems to listen attentively. We like to think he identifies with Jesus' infanthood and inexperienced parents. :) My current favorite lullabye to sing to Jude is "Silent Night," simply because the irony makes me laugh in the wee hours of the night. It's fun to identify a little bit with what Mary and Joseph were going through in Jesus' early weeks. Granted, we have no idea what it's like to give birth to the Son of God, we have a nice cozy house to stay in as opposed to a stable, and poor Mary probably couldn't even fathom the joys of an epidural - but it's mind blowing to realize that Jesus was a helpless infant. He was gassy, he had a first smile, and he probably was excited when he learned to grab his feet or reach out and touch something. What an amazing thing that our Lord humbled himself to being an infant.
If He was anything like every other infant in the world, Mary and Joseph's nights were anything but silent and He was hardly "tender and mild." :)
So we don't really have any big Christmas traditions that we plan on implementing this year, but we're open for suggestions! Feel free to let us know any treasured Christmas traditions you may have from childhood or that you may have started with your children.
Growing up, my family always spent Christmas Eve at my Grandpa's with my Dad's side of the family in Cincinnati. I have so many memories of running around his house, playing in his basement, and waiting on Aunt Mary and Uncle Mike to arrive so we could open the presents. The kids would take turns first, opening one present at a time. The stockings were always my favorite. I'm sure mine was filled with Bonne Belle chapstick and glittery nail polish (from my Grandpa, but he left the gift buying to my much more tween saavy Aunt Mary), and those little things made me so happy. :) Actually, I haven't changed too much...Shawn usually just fills my stocking with chocolate instead of glittery nail polish...but I remain just as happy. We'd spend the night at my Grandpa's, and wake up early to drive back home for Christmas. One of my parents would take the four of us to the only place open on Christmas morning...the Shell's gas station...and we'd each get to pick out donuts for the morning. The other parent would be dropped off at the house, and when we came back from getting the donuts - Santa would have arrived! As we got older, we'd sometimes be able to help Santa get the gifts while my younger siblings still picked out donuts for the family. Silly though it may seem, this little Christmas morning ritual of donuts at home is one of my favorite childhood Christmas traditions.
We pray that Jude has likewise fond memories of his childhood Christmases. Hopefully not memories of piles of presents or expensive toys - but memories of being with his family, enjoying the magic of the season, and understanding the enormity of what Jesus' birth meant to the world.
I hope you have an amazing Christmas and thank you for what you mean to our family!

November

11/02/08

39 Weeks!...
Okay, seriously? Am I really 39 weeks along? It's astounding to think about how much fear and worry went into us having a premature baby and how far away "full-term" seemed. Despite a night or two of wondering, "is this it?" and plenty more contractions, we are still preganant! Here is what babygaga has to say about our 39th week:
"Whether you give birth tomorrow or next week, it's pretty much all the same for your baby, who is now truly R-E-A-D-Y to face the big bright world outside of your womb. Speaking of wombs, your body is priming up for the big moment and hopefully, you're as prepared mentally as you can be. Your baby is well stocked up on fat, all their organs have put on the finishing touches. Here's hoping your child is already in the birthing position and basically just "hanging out" waiting for that elusive moment when all sysytems synchronize in your body to trigger the labor process."

11/05/08

still waiting...
I'll suppress the urge to talk about my thoughts on last night's election and just make note that Shawn and I were both watching the results with great interest. This is only my third time voting...my first time being when I was only 18. I'm not sure if I just didn't notice it in previous elections or if this year really was different, but there definitely seemed to be an incredible amount of buzz around the election. I wouldn't be surprised if the television ratings set some kind of record. Shawn and I made a night of it - watching "You're Not Elected Charlie Brown," and eating homemade apple pie and ice cream! We stayed up way too late waiting to see how Indiana and North Carolina voted (and at least according to CNN, the results still aren't in this morning?! Slowpokes!), and went to bed when I literally couldn't keep my eyes open any longer.
We actually thought we might have an Election Day baby last night! The contractions that have become so familiar had lessened considerably during the past few days, so I took note when I found myself contracting throughout the day yesterday. After dinner, they picked up, but I didn't want to even start timing them yet. I told Shawn that I'm so tired of the drama of timing and wondering and waiting...and just wanted to wait and see how strong they got. After a couple of hours they did start to get significantly strong, so Shawn started timing them for me. For about an hour and a half (give or take, I was trying to not pay attention and just tell Shawn when they started and stopped) they were every 2-3 minutes and were getting stronger. As seems to be the pattern, though, they eventually started to slow down and lessen in intensity. I didn't contract at all (that I know of, anyway) in my sleep last night and there's nothing going on this morning either. Because of all the false starts we've had, it's surreal to think that one of these days, the contractions aren't going to stop - they're only going to get stronger. I pretty much just assume that they'll slow down in time because that's the pattern that's been set.
I have to confess that my prayers have changed recently. Up until today, I've been praying that God would bring this little boy out in His perfect timing and that He'd give me patience to wait until that time. While it's a selfish prayer, I've now begun praying, "God, please! Bring him out today!"
Along those same lines, though, I've been thinking lately about how much God loves my little family and how much better He knows than we. Now that we've made it through the stress and fears of premature labor, I'm finding that a lot of good came of that experience - especially being on bed rest. What good, you may wonder? Well, let me explain.
1. The Effect of Bedrest On Our Marriage
When we first realized that I'd be restricted until at least 36 weeks, I thought for sure it would put a strain on Shawn and I. In fact, I kept waiting for Shawn to get frustrated with me for not being able to cook, clean, or take care of things. I kept waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And he never did. I honestly didn't know that it was humanly possible to as selfless as Shawn is. Not only did he take care of everything that needed tended to, he didn't even hint at complaining or making me feel guilty. In fact, the only fights we had were because Shawn wanted to take more care of me than I was allowing him. It was a great lesson for me in surrendering and trusting.
2. The Effect of Bedrest On Our Checkbook
Dave Ramsey says that every relationship has a "nerd" who loves numbers, spreadsheets, and budgets, and a "free spirit," who loves to not think about numbers, spreadsheets, or budgets. In our relationship, I tend to be the nerd and Shawn the free spirit. Even though we've always worked together on doing budgets, it just wasn't a priority to either one of us. Because I didn't have much else to do, I found myself checking our account online a lot and I started to track our expenses. Once I realized how much we were going to have to pay in hospital bills because of pre-term contractions, I started messing with the numbers to see how and when we would get those paid. Eventually, I was able to make a very detailed budget accounting for extra baby expenses, further hospital bills, and the cost of the baby's health insurance. I think the recent economic issues coupled with looming hospital bills made us both take a much keener interest than usual in making sure we kept to a budget. It took me a LOT of time to look through and track all of our spending, and then make a budget to reflect that. For the first couple of months, I had to track our spending every single day to make sure we were staying in the budget and had to be meticulous about when each bill was paid. I know that I wouldn't have had the time or the energy to do this if I hadn't been on bedrest. I also had the time to research our bank, only to discover that we were getting ripped off in fees and our APY rate was ridiculously low. So I had the time to switch our banking insitution - a feat in itself since most of our bill pay is automatic! I know that very soon time will be a scarce commodity, so I'm grateful to have had the chance to set up a system that works really well for us.
3. The Effect of Bedrest on my Time With God
I'm ashamed to admit it, but when I get busy, the very first thing to go is the time that I spend with God. After a few days of being "too busy," it's easy to then skip that time because "I just don't feel like it." Pre Term labor caused me to hit my knees in fear and bedrest helped me to stay consistent. Suddenly, I had more time on my hands than I knew what to do with, so some days I'd pick up my Bible because there just wasn't much else to do. Even after the fear of pre-term labor and boredom of bedrest wore off, I find myself craving that daily time with God like I used to crave coffee. My day just isn't the same if I don't talk to Him, and I feel empty if I go a few days without slowing down to spend time in His presence.
Really, the list could go on and on - bedrest helped me see that my home doesn't have to be perfectly clean, that God can protect this child when I'm incapable of doing so, that I have amazingly understanding co-workers, and that this little child is loved more than he could possibly ever know.
So in light of all the stress and drama we endured, I think it's safe to say that I'm grateful for it and am even more aware that the gifts of God are good and perfect - even if it doesn't seems so.

11/06/08

appointment update...
I have to admit that I was not in a good mood this morning. I was tired and achy, my throat hurt, I was swollen, and the very last thing I wanted to do was head to our appointment only to be told, I was sure, that I'd made no progress since last week. As we waited for the Doctor, my head was full of whining, if I'm being completely honest. Even though we hear it every week now, something in my heart just melted when Dr. Ponder put the doppler on my belly and we heard his heartbeat. I was struck with the reminder that I'm carrying a life. I have the amazing privilege of nurturing an entire human being inside of my body. It's worth it. So worth it.
And then, during the cervical exam, the Doctor told us that I am now 3cm dialated and 75% effaced! I almost cried, I was so excited! We've had a couple of tough nights of contractions that have eventually gone away, and it's been discouraging to think they might not be making a difference. So to know that the pain is doing something was just what I needed to hear! I asked him if it would possible for him to sweep my membranes, and he said, "sure." I had expected that procedure to be painful, but to be honest...it was less painful than some of the cervical checks I've had. I think it depends on the Doctor, but it didn't really hurt at all.
Our next appointment is Wednesday, when I'll be 41 weeks. He said if I haven't gone into labor before that - then our Wednesday appointment will include an ultrasound, fetal monitoring, and the possibility of induction. I guess at 41 weeks they leave it up to the parents. My immediate thought is, "heck yeah! Induce me!" but we'll see if I change my mind by Wednesday. I always thought I'd be more than happy to go over my due date and wouldn't want to be induced unless it was absolutely necessary..but at this point, I'm so ready! He did also say he thought that odds were that I wouldn't make it to our next appointment, but we'll see. Since the appointment, I've been having some contractions, but I typically do for about a half a day after I am checked.
After we finished up at the OB, Shawn took me to Starbucks where I got a yummy Gingerbread Latte (decaf, don't worry) to soothe my throat. Between hearing the heartbeat, the good news on progress, and the coffee...I'm out of my funky mood. Thank goodness!

11/09/08

40 Weeks...
So today, November 9th, is my official due date. We've gotten plenty of, "you haven't had him yet?!", advice on how to induce labor, and a variety of labor stories. I wish I had some news that things were moving along, but things are pretty much the same. Still having contractions, but they never get strong enough for us to head into the hospital. Here's what babygaga has to say about this week:
"This is it. If you haven’t already gone into delivery, we’ve officially arrived at that time where all you’re doing is trying to patiently play the oh-so-maddening waiting game. Your long-awaited miracle is undoubtedly just as impatient as you to get things moving along. You can generally expect a head-first delivery unless your healthcare provider is unable to coax them out of breech position, in which case their feet come first. After nine months of waiting and even after your wonder-baby is finally out, your doctor or midwife will probably make you wait another five minutes while they give your child an Apgar score (see below); suction any fluids or mucous that may be blocking their newly exposed airways; and clean the remaining vernix and blood from their little body. After all the waiting, you’ll finally get to hold your exhausted little love-bug. Just a heads up: it’s fairly common for newborns to have a bit of chapping or even red rashes on their skin. Gerber babies don’t just pop out sparkly clean and smooth from the womb.
It’ll come whether you’re ready or not, so grab your bag, call the doc, get a hold of the grandfolks-to-be and get ready to execute your much-rehearsed plan of action. PLEASE DO NOT put the pedal to the metal. Labor typically last 13 hours (8 hours for mothers who have delivered once already), and getting to the birth center 10 minutes earlier isn’t likely to make a big difference. Try to keep a level head and drive safely: there’s a lot at stake."

11/15/08

jude is here!...
I only have moment and want to post our birth story later, but just wanted to announce that Jude Christian was born on November 11th at 5:58am. He was 7lbs 13oz and 20 inches long....and pretty much perfect. :)
"Jude" means praise or thanks and we haven't stopped doing just that!

11/16/08

jude? like the beatles song?...
This seems to be the most typicaly response people give us when we tell them we named our son Jude. I suppose it's natural - Shawn and I both love the Beatles and most people know how important music is to Shawn's life. So let me explain to you why we named him Jude lest you think we named our son after a Beatles song. :)
We actually were eating ice cream with friends when "Hey Jude" played. Shawn looked at me and asked what I thought of the name "Jude." Keep in mind that throughout the pregnancy, Shawn would ask what I thought of random baby names several times a day. Most of the time he was asking me ridiculous names and most of the time I would claim my veto power. When he asked about Jude, I paused, and said, "hmmm...maybe." We tossed the name around for a few minutes, seeing how it sounded with "Maurer," and debating whether we liked "Jude," or "Judah," and if Christian would work as a middle name. I'm a big fan of names being meaningful and we've thrown away several names because we didn't like their meanings. So the name was almost completely solidified when we looked the name up and found out it means, "Praise" or "Thanks."
Yep, that's exactly how we felt about this boy. The entire pregnancy has been one big ball of thanks to God so the name is entirely perfect. So we chose the name Jude because the meaning fits our son and we like the way it sounds. The fact that there's a great Beatles song that we can sing to him is just gravy. :) You all also have our full permission to sing the Beatles song to him at any point. Here is a link for more information about the name "Jude"
http://babynamesworld.parentsconnect.com/meaning_of_Jude.html
And just for fun...you should definitely check this out. It would explain why we sometimes sing, "remember...to rerever into your hawt..."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wgrrQwLdME8

11/17/08

jude's birth story...
Here are some of the details about Jude's birth:
On Monday, November 10th, I thought my water might have broken, so after a day of work, I called the OB and they asked me to come in and be tested.

They tested and found out that my water hadn’t broken, and I was dialated to “a 3, maybe a 4.” The nurse told us she thought we’d probably be in labor soon, but to keep timing contractions and counting kicks. As she was describing the movement I should’ve been feeling, I told her that I hadn’t felt him moving that much in awhile. So a non-stress test was ordered. We took the non-stress test for about half an hour, and Jude was just fine. I could actually see him kicking so hard that he was moving the monitor up and down, but I could barely feel it, which would probably account for the fewer movements I was feeling. He was moving just fine, but his movements were just more subtle and less detectable by feel.

So Shawn and I went home, a little discouraged by the lack of labor. We picked up a couple of last minute baby things from Target and ordered a Mario’s Pizza to eat at home. Once home, we ate the pizza and my contractions continued about every six minutes apart. We started getting excited again and I bounced on an exercise ball for awhile, but around 9:00 they just completely stopped. We went to bed around 11:00pm, and I distinctly remember dreaming about really painful contractions. They eventually got so painful that they woke me up, so I decided to empty my bladder to see if that helped. When I sat up, I started to leak heavily, and once I made it to the toilet, it was a gush. I did my best to clean up. I thought that it was probably my water breaking, but wanted to wait a little bit just to be sure. So I went out into the living room and started timing my contractions. They were coming about every 5 or 6 minutes apart and began to get very painful. After about 25 minutes of timing them, I realized this was probably labor, but I wanted to give Shawn as long as possible to sleep. In between contractions, I started gathering my things and getting ready and they increased in strength and consistency. At about 1:40, I realized that we probably needed to get to the hospital rather quickly, so I woke Shawn up. He was adorable, sleepy, and excited. J We both got dressed and ready and left the house around 1:55.

I remember the ride to the hospital being awful. The contractions were picking up very quickly and would usually make me nauseated at the end of each. We almost had to pull over to allow me to vomit several times and sitting down in the car was excruciating. We finally got to the hospital around 1:15am. The only time I snapped at Shawn during the entire birth was at this point. He was trying to figure out if he needed to drop me off, if he should park in the parking garage and walk with me, and if I needed a wheelchair. I kept saying things like, “I don’t care, just get me there,” and trying to tell him that I’d rather not be in a wheelchair, and he kept trying to figure out what to do. Finally, I snapped, “Just drop me off at the door now! I’ll walk!” So he dropped me off, parked the car, grabbed our birthing stuff (which was quite the handful, including an exercise ball!) and we walked together to check-in. I did actually vomit on my way to the check-in counter, which was embarrassing. Once we checked in, we were taken to the triage where it seemed to take forever for a nurse to come in and check me. I think I vomited again while waiting. Thankfully, Rhonda got there around that time, and I think she hurried a nurse in to check me. Shawn was amazing, helping me count through contractions and letting me lean on him when I needed to. Once checked, I was told that I’d dialated to 5cm and was wheeled to a labor and delivery room. Once we got there, the contractions picked up intensely. I was doing my best to count through them with Shawn, but I actually found myself having to scream through some of the more intense contractions. I was still getting nauseated at the end of a few and ended up vomiting a couple more times. I asked Rhonda about how much longer she thought labor might be, and she said that for first time moms, you can typically count on being in labor an hour for every centimeter. Since I was a five, I reasoned that I would probably be looking at another five hours. Eventually, I started asking for an epidural as the contractions got stronger and stronger. I ended up begging for the epidural. Most of this period is pretty blurry, but I do remember crying a couple of times. I also remember flipping from my back to being on all fours, trying to find any position that would be less painful. I was in that position when the aneseiologist came in to give me the epidural. I was checked again and had gone from 5cm to 8 in 45 minutes! He explained that I’d need to stay extremely still while he was injecting the needle, even if I was contracting. During the injection, I was sitting on the edge of the bed with my chin to my chest while Shawn talked me through the contractions I was having. Dr. Lipscomb also came in at this point and helped me through them, telling me how great of a job I was doing. It seems like it took forever for the epidural to kick in, but it was probably only a few minutes as I only remember having two more contractions. Once the drugs started, I was in heaven! It felt so different and I could relax my body and mind. Shawn, Rhonda, and I joked around for awhile and chatted. I could still feel pressure with each contraction and could sometimes feel my belly tightening, but I couldn’t feel any pain. I think it was about an hour later that the nurse checked me again, and I had dialated completely. They wanted to let me wait a little bit longer to see if I would have the urge to push, but I never did. After a bit, the nurse came in and told me that I could start pushing if I wanted to. So, I began. I honestly couldn’t feel anything, but she told me when to push and they seemed to be satisfied with the job I was doing…even without being able to feel. Apparently Jude’s heartrate was dropping when I would push, so they had me put on an oxygen mask. Thankfully, his heart rate never got to dangerous levels and the mask seemed to be giving us both enough oxygen to be fine. I asked if I could use the bar that goes across the bed to help with the pushing. It attached on either side of the bed, they hung a towel from the middle, and I grasped the towel with each push. It helped me to curl a little bit and have a little extra oomph with each push. It felt like I pushed for several hours, but according to Shawn, it was about 30 or 45 minutes. They called Dr. Lipscomb back in, and I pushed for awhile longer until Jude was born! He was born at 5:58am on November 11th. He was born with a bit of a cone head, but that’s normal and has rounded out by today (4 days old). His apgars were 8 and 9 right after birth. Shawn cut the cord (twice, actually), and I did have a second degree tear.

As soon as he was born, he was put on my chest while the Dr. dealt with the afterbirth. I held him for a few minutes and then they cleaned him off, gave him eye drops, tested him, etc. Once that was done, I was able to hold him again and nurse him for the first time. Jude hasn’t had any issues with being jaundice or anything else. He’s pretty much perfect.

October

10/02/08

everything looks good!...
As you can probably tell from the title of this post, our doctor's appointment went pretty well today. My blood pressure is nice and low and Baby Maurer's heartbeat is strong! I am apparently one centimeter dialated and 50% effaced. This was the first time we were given actual numbers...I'm not quite sure why we weren't told this before. She told me that I've been one centimeter dialated for awhile (probably since our second visit to the hospital), and that the chart notes said that I was 25% effaced at our visit a week ago. I could let myself get concerned about that, but to be honest, I'm just not. I'm only two and a half days away from being 35 weeks - so beyond my water breaking before that time, I'm not letting myself get too rattled right now.
We were also told that at our next appointment (Wednesday morning), I'll most likely be taken off of bed rest...hooray! Shawn and I have already talked about self-imposing modified bed rest until we're 36 weeks along, but I'm still really excited to have some leeway!
Also, I added some pictures of the nursing cover I made to the "Nursery Progress" album, in case you're curious. :)

10/05/08

Week 35!...
Yay! Our little guy has made it to Week 35!!!!!!!! I don't think exclamation points do my excitement a bit of justice here. We were told by our Doctor that if I started to go into labor at 35 weeks, they would not stop it, but go ahead and let me deliver. Let me tell you - that's scary and hugely exciting at the same time. Mostly exciting. :)
So let's see, what else is going on with us...Oh! Shawn's sister (Heather) will be coming down on Friday to stay with us for a few days! She very thoughtfully wanted to come help us out while I'm on bed rest, and it'll be really nice to have some company. We're both really excited to have her and Noah here, we don't see nearly enough of them!
My good friend Jill is throwing us a shower at Pinedale on Saturday! I'm really looking forward to it and am so grateful for Jill's thoughtfulness. I'll have to make sure to bring my camera and put up lots of pictures!
I'm starting to relax a little about the possibility of going into labor - both because each day means less NICU time, and because we've been able to get so much prepared. If I were to go into labor today, we'd have to make a quick trip to get newborn diapers, wipes, and a couple of other small things - but other than that, we're pretty much set. It's a far cry from where we were when I started with contractions at 29 weeks!
I forgot to mention that we went to our childbirth class this past Thursday where we learned all about the epidural, narcotics, and C-Sections. Let me tell you, that epidural video scared the crap out of me! I was fine through all of the childbirth parts, the obvious pain the women were in, the groaning and pushing...but something about seeing where that needle is supposed to go freaked me out! The thought of having to stay curled up and still like that for 15 minutes while they insert the needle - and then having to stay on the bed the rest of my labor - just scared me. That's not to say I won't have an epidural...I was just surprised by how much the video shocked me! I'm still planning on going into labor with a very open mind. I'd love to have a natural childbirth and will do my best to do so. However, if I end up getting an epidural or a C-section, that's just fine.
Also, I swiped some pictures from my cousin's Facebook page (thanks, Jake!) of the Baby Shower that my Mom and sister threw me in Indiana. They're in the "Baby Shower" picture album.
Here is how Baby Maurer is growing at 35 Weeks:
Congratulations! You’re now carrying nearly 6 lbs of baby not counting their amniotic fluid, the umbilical cord, or the placenta itself. We’re impressed because that’s a LOT of work non-stop. Are you feeling proud of yourself yet? Well, get to it—you’ve done an amazing job! At this point, your little grower is almost busting out of the womb size-wise, which make their restricted attempts to move much challenging. Of course, your stubborn little sucker is still trying to move around as if they weren’t in a cramped space. And the accumulationg baby fat deposits are starting to level off so your little butter ball will be padded and warm when they head out of their super snug little home.
And how's mom doing? We’re sure you’ve noted that the contractions are picking up and despite the obvious appeal of getting the pregnancy over with at this point, try not to jump the gun too soon by declaring actual labor. Of course, if it’s getting to the point where you’re having contractions continuously— you’re in labor and yes, it’s time for the "grab your bags we’re gonna have a baby" rush. For the rest of you not yet in labor, your watermelon-betwixt-my-legs waddle is as charming as ever, not to mention the glorious ongoing back pain and fatigue. Hang in there! Once you’ve got your miracle baby on the outside, this will all be a dim memory. So, catch the cat naps whenever possible and keep yourself hydrated with water and try to imagine how all of this will (hopefully) be much funnier in hindsight.
Your doctor or midwife should soon start monitoring cervical effacement (thinning of the cervix) and dilation in order to predict labor. If your cervix is already dilated labor is probably not far away—although there are some moms who walk around with a dilated cervix for a couple of days prior to labor.
Let’s talk about pain. Reports on the intensity of pain experienced during labor and childbirth are widely varied from woman to woman. The pain experienced depends on several things including your own natural pain threshold, medication, birthing position, fetal position, previous births, your general health and the actual birthing environment. Of course, there are natural births, cesarean deliveries, spinals, IV’s and other pain medications, all of which also play into how you experience pain during child birth.
Ideally, you should attempt to be as relaxed as possible and willing to accept the pain as part of the birthing process. In reality, your experience of the birthing process is unique to your body and how you choose to respond to it. Pain is a two part process: the first part is the physical experience of the pain and the second is your emotional reaction to your experience—and that is the part you have the most control over. Choosing to accept and endure the pain of child-birth (with or without medication) can be an empowering experience for any woman, as well as making the birthing process notably easier for those assisting you."

10/10/08

2 more days!...
Just two more days until I am 36 weeks and, as my Doctor put it, "You can contract until your little heart's content." I had thought at our last appointment on Wednesday that I would be taken off of bed rest, but they would apparently like me to wait until I'm 36 weeks along. Which...if you hadn't noticed...is only 2 days away!! Our appointment showed that the baby's heartbeat is great, and he's measuring exactly as he should be. I've not dialated or effaced any further since last week (even though I was having some wicked contractions Tuesday night that I thought for sure were doing something), and my blood pressure is normal. Hooray! I also had the Group B Strep (GBS) test done. Basically, if it's positive, it just means I'll need have antibiotics through and IV before giving birth so that I don't pass it along to the baby. From what I understand, many people carry it around. They're not sure how we get it, but in most adults it is not dangerous and often doesn't even present symptoms. Still, I'd rather not have an IV, so I'm hoping for a negative. Our next appointment is Thursday morning.
I have had an unexpectedly eventful past couple of days! I haven't been able to attend our Wednesday night Small Group because of bed rest, and have been missing our 9th grade girls something terrible. Thankfully, Jill and Sherri (my co-leaders) have been awesome about teaching and taking care of things. Occasionally, we have an "Activity Night," which just means there is no lesson, take your kids and do something fun. Jill mentioned last week that since I haven't seen the girls in so long, she could bring the girls over to our house on Wednesday for Activity Night. I was thrilled!
I had thought we'd just hang out, talk, play board games...just chat and catch up. Little did I know that those amazingly sweet 9th grade girls had planned a surprise baby shower! My heart just melts at their awesomeness! They brought food and drinks (many of them my favorites!), and some awesome presents for Baby Maurer. The girls made him pictures and even decorated our front door with (washable ) paint that says "It's A Boy." It was one of the sweetest, most thoughtful things in the entire world.
Before last night's Worth the Wait practice, one of the girls had asked me several times if I was going to be at practice that night. I thought she had something serious she needed to talk to me about, so I got there a little early to make myself available to chat. Well, about 15 minutes before practice got started, several of my WTW girls plus Beth and Taylor (good friends of ours - Shawn stayed with their family when he was an intern and Taylor was our program passer-outer for our wedding) walked in with two ginormous baskets filled with all kinds of baby goodies! I was shocked! Here, I was ready for some heart to heart about how maybe this girl was struggling and needing some accountability...or something equally as serious...and I get presents instead!! The baskets were filled with many baby things that we need, and it was so much fun to look through all of it! Let me just tell you - this kid will not have to repeat an outfit until he's at least 6 months old! :)
I feel so blessed and love to think about how much this little guy is loved before he's even been born.
As exciting as the past two days have been, we have even more excitement coming up this weekend if you can believe it! Heather and Noah will be flying in this afternoon and staying with us for a few days. I know I've said this before, but Shawn and I are really looking forward to having them here. I'm being thrown a baby shower on Saturday at Pinedale, which I'm really looking forward to, as well! It's always fun when the people you love the most are gathered in one place for you to hang out with. :) This coming Tuesday and Thursday evenings are the Worth the Wait Dress Rehearsals. I'm excited because while I know I may go into labor before then (and Dawn is fully capable of taking over in my absence), I had originally thought for sure that we'd have a baby by this point. After Dress Rehearsals, I no longer have to worry about doing Worth the Wait in the evenings...yay! So lots of stuff happening in the next week!
A few days ago, I added some more recent pictures in the "Baby Bump" album, so feel free to check out how...ahem...large I've gotten!

10/13/08

Week 36 is finally here!...

Here is how Baby Maurer is developing this week:
"The countdown continues… and in fetal developments: most of the bones (soft skull aside) in their little body are now completely hardened, providing a solid structure from which they can now make their grand debut into the world. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, we are structurally ready for a secure launch. In physical fitness news: their muscle tone has also improved over these past few weeks, and you’ll definitely be impressed by their steel-like Ulnar grasp (a newborn reflex that occurs if you lay your finger in their palm). Finally, in the fluids/excretion department: the amniotic fluid-to-baby ratio has fallen over these past weeks, although they’re still swallowing fluid (building up even more meconium for that historic first poop), and some vernix caseosa. They will be more than ready to swallow and digest milk after birth. Just in case you didn’t get it quite yet: you’ve got yourself an adorable and hungry 6.5 lbs 20 inch baby—are you ready?
If you haven’t done so already, you’re going to need to take the time to do some baby-proofing. We know you don’t have loads of energy right now, but waiting until your little crawler is getting into the Drain-o or sticking their finger in a light socket just isn’t the safest strategy. There are plenty of articles and check lists to assist you in making sure your home is a safe place for your new explorer (check out sites like: amazon.com’s safety products, and BabyCenter's buying guides (follow link to safety section). Go ahead and fix those broken cupboard latches and window screens. Hide or toss out harmful chemicals, detergents and aerosols as newborns are typically very sensitive to air-born agents and toxic cleaning supplies and if exposed, babies can easily breakout with rashes, have belabored breathing and watery eyes, along with others signs of irritation. Simply thinking about removing all these products can be overwhelming, so start small if necessary. Use vinegar to dust instead of Lysol, and if you’re planning on painting the nursery, try to stay away from the industry-standard synthetic mixes. Also, think about purchasing organic or dermatologist approved cotton comforters and pillows for the crib. It’s a nuisance to think about right now—but trust us: once your child is on the outside, you’re going to have a lot less time to be dealing with baby-proofing."

10/17/08

baby mine, don't you cry...
I just cannot get over the fact that I am 36 Weeks and 5 Days along. In just two days, I'll be 37 weeks, which is...(drumroll)...full term!!! To the surprise of all of our Doctors and the utter shock of Shawn and I...it appears that we have proven not one, but two fetal fibronectin tests wrong! I can't tell you how thankful I am for your prayers and how in awe of God I am. He's given us peace and calm when we were so scared, He's strengthened our marriage through the fears and worries, and He's taken care of our precious son when his health was out of our control.
So, being 36 weeks along means that I am officially off bedrest! It's such a great feeling to know that while they hurt, contractions aren't a bad thing anymore. They're actually a great thing, as they're moving my body towards eventual labor. At our appointment yesterday, we found out that I'm 1-2 cm dialated, still 50% effaced, and his head is starting to move downwards (he didn't use the word "engaged," but I think that's what it's called). I've been having a lot of contractions in the past week, so I kind of thought I'd be further along. We saw our favorite doctor again (Dr. Ponder), and it was kind of fun to see his excitement that I'd made it to 36.5 weeks. He said that Baby Maurer was definitely downward, which is the ideal position for birth. In fact, he put his two fingers around the baby's head, and said, "I can actually feel his head right here," to which Baby Maurer responded by kicking. We've learned that we've got a fiesty kiddo in there, who makes it quite clear when he doesn't like something that's going on! Our next appointment is this Thursday afternoon.
Now as to the title of this blog...about the time Shawn and I got engaged, we started talking about number of children, baby names, etc. One night, we were on the phone, and I told Shawn that I had always loved this song from the movie "Beaches," called Baby of Mine, and that I had always wanted to sing that lullabye to my child. After Shawn asked me what the lyrics were, he told me that the song is actually from "Dumbo," and that HE had always loved that song and wanted to sing the lullabye to his child. What's ironic is that I had never seen Dumbo, and Shawn had never seen Beaches (actually, I still haven't seen Dumbo, and Shawn still hasn't seen Beaches)! I often put the headphones on my stomach and play the song for our baby. I love to sing it to him already, and since we'd begun pre-term labor, couldn't help but tearing up as I sang, "from your head down to your toes, you're not much goodness knows. but you're so precious to me, sweet as can be...baby of mine." I don't know if Shawn and I both hearing and loving that song was mere coincidence, or God fusing our lives together before we ever met, but that particular song has been very special to both of us.
We had our Baby Shower at Pinedale this past Saturday, which was so much fun! We got all kinds of great items - a Bumbo seat that converts into a booster seat, some bathtime fun stuff, adorable clothes and blankets, car shades, wipes and diapers, a sleep positioner, and tons of other great stuff! Jill and Laura did such a great job planning, and I had a blast.
Shawn's sister, Heather, and nephew, Noah were here from Friday to Wednesday this past weekend, and what a blessing they were! We hadn't seen Noah since Thanksgiving, so we both really enjoyed getting to know him again. I have to tell you that he is just about the cutest, happiest child I have ever met. Even with a cold and teething, he spent most of his time smiling. Once Noah got used to Cole's "kisses" and Cole got used to not being able to play with Noah's toys, the two of them got along just great! I'm pretty sure Cole was actually depressed when he checked every room for them on Wednesday afternoon and realized they were gone. It was also nice to have some company while I was working from home, and Heather helped us get some of our household cleaning done I've had to put off, and got us all caught up on laundry! We don't see nearly enough of either one of our families, so it was really nice to have some of "home" here.
Shawn and I were able to get a few things we felt like we really needed before the baby gets here (mostly breastfeeding stuff, cotton swabs...stuff like that), so we are now officially prepared (go ahead and laugh, I know how ironic that statment sounds to you who are already parents). Our nursery is set up and ready to go, things with work are in line for me to take maternity leave at any moment, and we're just pretty much ready to meet this kiddo!
I have to admit that I've been struggling with complaining the past couple of days. In the past week, I gained 10 pounds due to swelling (ridiculous! who gains 10 lbs from swelling?!), and am just finding it increasingly difficult to move, sleep, get up, sit down, breathe...pretty much anything! I'm finding that I can be a little cranky, and unfortunately, I've been taking that out on Shawn for the past day or two. I was just thinking this morning that I need to knock it off, though. I was thinking about my Mom, who worked at a grocery store up until right before she delivered both my older brother and I. I can't imagine how swollen her feet got in those last months - and to think that when she was pregnant with me, she had to go home and then take care of a baby. I was also thinking about a friend of mine who told me that she started swelling like I am now at 5 months....and here I am complaining about a week of this. Not to mention...hello!!...this is exactly what I prayed for and wanted...to still be pregnant at this point! So seriously, if you see me being cranky or hear me complaining too much about pregnancy woes - I give you full permission to tell me to knock it off and think about how much worse it could be!
I'm sorry to have written so much, I just haven't been able to update in awhile, and so much has been going on! As always, thank you so much for your prayers for this little one, and thank you for caring enough about our little family to continue reading our updates.

10/18/08

to make you smile... read this the other day and it made me laugh out loud. I thought you all might enjoy it too:
"If you’ve paid attention to any pregnancy books, you’ll read that most babies are born between 36 and 41 weeks. You’ve heard that, haven’t you?
I swear, it seems to me that every woman, especially first time moms, think that their baby is going to come at 36 weeks. Here’s a hint: Most likely, it won’t.
I know, I know. I’m a mean person. How could I tell you that your baby isn’t going to come today? You know you’re thinking that.
Wait- what was that twinge- is that labor? Ooh, maybe it was labor? Could it be labor?
No.
I know it’s hard to hear that, but the sooner that you learn to accept the cold hard truth that early labors happen to “other people,” the sooner you can get on with the rest of your pregnancy. Worrying about whether or not today will be the day isn’t going to make the baby come any faster. Trust me, I’ve tried.
You’ve been looking in the mirror and you’ve wondered how you could possibly get any bigger. There’s no room for the baby in there! You just KNOW you have to go into labor early.
Unfortunately, your body has other plans. It plans on keeping that baby in there forever!
Think of it this way: Would you rather have the baby stay “longer” now, when it is a fetus in your belly, or move back in after college? At least now, if the baby is in your belly, people will feel sorry for you and bring ice cream and cake. When the kid moves in after college? They’ll just gossip behind your back and call you a bad parent.
Staying pregnant for a few more weeks is totally worth it."

10/19/08

37 Weeks!...
I know, it's hard for me to believe, too! I've been contracting like crazy for the past day or so, and it's so nice to not have to immediately go to bedrest and freak out mode! Just as the contractions start to get strong and regular, they kind of fizzle out, so while it doesn't look like I'm in true prelabor, it may not be too far away. Here's what is going on with Baby Maurer in his 37th week in the womb:
"It’s the calm before the storm. Changes in your baby's weight have leveled off with only a few ounces of fat added this week. At this point your baby should weigh in at around 7 lbs and 20 inches (with boys somewhat heavier and longer than girls). Happily, as far as internal organs go, they are now developed enough to function in the outside world although the oh-so-important immune system is still developing and will continue to do so after birth. With a large boost of antibodies provided by breast milk when nursing begins. Fighting infection and staying healthy should be well within their physical capacity when your little fighter is born.
Your health care provider will assess the likelihood of where you are relative to your upcoming birthing process—seeing as you’ve now arrived at that waiting phase that could turn into labor at any time. Various charming indicators such as loose stools, expelling your mucus plus, a dilated cervix and increased Braxton-Hicks contractions are all signs that labor is only a few days away. The infamous water breaking may or may not be your first true indicator that labor has commenced. However, water breaks for only 15% of mothers and despite what Hollywood would have us believe, is more frequently just a slow leak rather than a large gush.
Be patient: if labor doesn’t start this week, or even next, keep in mind that only 4-5% of women actual deliver on their predicted due date. What’s more if this is your first pregnancy, you can expect to be anywhere from two days to two weeks late. You can distract yourself by keeping track of fetal movements, mostly to reassure yourself that all is well with your little miracle. In the off chance that movements do start to decrease substantially, try not to freak out and instead, call your doctor of midwife and discuss it with them."

10/22/08

i should get an award...
...for having the most contractions in a pregnancy without actually producing a baby.
We had our annual big to-do Salem Pregnancy Care Center banquet last night...quite possibly SPCC's biggest event of the year. The staff spent the morning setting up and decorating the banquet hall, during which I was on my feet most of the time. When I got home, I took a quick nap and Shawn and I got ready and headed downtown for the banquet. After we ate our dinner, I noticed that the light, inconsistent contractions I'd been having all day were getting stronger and a little bit more consistent. I started timing them and writing down the times (I'm sure everyone at our table thought I was strange since I was checking the time on my cell phone every few minutes). The contractions were coming at about every 2-5 minutes, lasting for about 50-60 seconds, and were getting stronger as time drew on. I knew we were supposed to time them for an hour, and I really wanted to stay until the end of the banquet, so we just stayed put and I kept timing.
At the end of the banquet, Shawn and I decided that we probably needed to not stay and help clean up like we would have normally done, but that we should head home...just in case. On our way to find my boss to let her know what was going on, I had to face several people with whom I needed to make small-talk...NOT an easy task when you're having contractions and wondering if you might actually be in labor! So we headed home, changed clothes, got comfy on the couch, and I grabbed some chocolate (I was thinking, "If I do go into labor tonight, what would I really want to eat before I have to go to the hospital and not be able to eat until I deliver?" Chocolate. The answer is always chocolate.)
I was still having regular contractions, and Shawn started timing them using this cool website www.contractionmaster.com. I was having them about 3-6 minutes apart, and they were lasting anywhere from 16 seconds to 1 minute 50 seconds. I was ready to head to the hospital, but Shawn reminded me that I really wanted to do as much laboring as possible while we were at home. So, home we stayed. At around 10:30 (after about three hours of regular contractions), they slowed down to about every 10 minutes. I went to bed around 11:30...I woke up a couple of times with some strong contractions, but was able to go back to sleep fairly quickly. I had a couple of contractions this morning, but nothing more than usual.
So there you have it - lotsa contractions and no baby. So for you mammas who are reading this - does this mean anything? Am I close to labor, or are some women just more "contract-y" than others?
I hope this post doesn't sound like I'm complaining, by the way. I actually get excited when I do start having regular contractions because I really am hoping that labor is just around the corner. I'm totally fine with having the contractions, it's the "is this it? should we go to the hospital? should we stay? what do we need to grab if we do go to the hospital? should i try to sleep? are they getting stronger? was that one long contraction or two short ones?" kind of stuff that I'm growing weary of. If I don't go into labor beforehand, our next appointment is tomorrow (Thursday) at 4:20.
I installed our carseat last night (much easier than I thought it'd be, by the way), and the mirror-thing that lets you see the baby through the rearview mirror. I'm pretty sure I did that wrong...I don't think the mirror is supposed to tilt...so I'll have Shawn fix that, but other than that, we're good to go! At 29 weeks, I made a list of baby things that I wanted to get done/have bought when I was in the "oh my gosh, he could come any day!" mode. The very last thing on that list was installing the carseat. It is SUCH a great feeling to just be ready. So we're ready whenever he is!

10/24/08

no baby yet...
So our Doctor's appointment yesterday was fairly undramatic (about time, huh?). No real changes going on, except that all of the contractions I've been having are softening my cervix. The Dr. said that I'm still 1-2 cm dialated, and that he could actually feel the baby's head. Shawn asked him when they start talking about induction, and he said probably not until I'm 40 weeks along, at least. Because the standard of heading to the hospital when contractions are five minutes apart and lasting for 45 seconds just doesn't seem to apply to us, I asked the Dr. how we know when it's time for the hospital. He told us that we should base it on intensity, rather than frequency. So, I guess when the contractions have me doubling over is when we'll head in again. Until then, it looks like I just get to have these fun pains in the comfort of my own home.
The Dr. did seem a little concerned about my swelling, and said that if my blood pressure went back up, we might have to discuss induction. However, I tend to think that my blood pressure started climbing because of all the stress I was feeling at that period. It's completely stabalized since, so I don't think it'll be an issue. He also suggested putting books or blankets at the bottom of the bed in order to keep my feet elevated throughout the night. I had never heard of that - but we tried it last night - and it worked!! My ankles looked somewhat ankle-like this morning!!
So, it looks like things are progressing very normally for me right now, which is such a relief. I think I've been able to drop my guard a little bit and finally admit that it could very well be another two weeks before we have this baby. It's almost like I've been afraid to seriously suggest that we could actually go to our due date...but it's looking more and more like it's a possibility. Don't get me wrong, I'm totally ready to hold this baby in my arms, but I don't feel like I'm on high alert for any day now.

10/26/08

week 38...eek!...
Okay, I know I say this every week, but seriously...can you believe it?! We've made it to 38 weeks!! I am just thrilled beyond belief. Along those same lines...remember me saying how much it freaked me out to hear on CNN that there are such-and-such days left in the election, because Baby Maurer is due just five days after that? As I'm typing this, I'm watching CNN and seeing that there are 9 days left of this election. 9 days? 9 days! Crazy.
So I've been feeling pretty good...both physically and emotionally. Probably my biggest complaint right now is that I gave up hopes of getting a full night's sleep a few months ago. What with the peeing, the contractions, the pelvic pain, and the vivid dreams, it's been quite the feat to get sleep at night. For those of you who have been pregnant, I realize this is nothing new and is a very common problem late in pregnancy. Thankfully, I'm able to sleep in a little bit later occasionally and take a nap every once in awhile to compensate...and seem to be functioning just fine! Beyond that, I'm feeling pretty good. The swelling has leveled off (seriously, putting books underneath the end of our bed helped a ton!), work has decreased in stress, and I'm just thrilled to be 38 weeks and in the clear.
We're still slowly working on baby stuff (washing stuff, shopping for deals, etc.), but we finally don't have any last minute pressing things to do before he gets here. While I'm getting more and more nervous about the labor, I'm also getting more and more excited to see this baby - to see who he looks like, what his personality is like, and how God has knit him together in my womb.
In case you're wondering what is going on with our little one (who is hopefully nice and chubby now!), here is the update from babgaga.com:
"As you know, you've arrived at the final leg of your pregnancy journey, and if you're still carrying your little love around, they've just about reached their birth weight (somewhere between 6 to 8 pounds is average depending on whether they're a boy or girl). There really isn't a lot to report on baby this week, so lets do a quick recount of where we're at: all internal organ systems are pretty much ready for the outside world, they've got their meconium stockpile building up (their first black baby poo), lots of healthy baby fat, a rapidly developing brain (that'll keep growing with them for years to come), and they've more or less reached official baby status-- all they need to do is "head out" and say hello to the rest of the world and especially their ready-to-pop momma.
And how's mom doing? Hang in there momma, it's only a matter of time before the obnoxious and painful fake contractions you felt in your back, lower belly, and pelvic region will be replaced by real contractions... which are even more obnoxious and painful. You'll know when the real ones kick in because they're more intensely painful (woo!) and they spread over the entire uterus, through the lower back and into your pelvis.
If you're having trouble sleeping (which about 100% of women in this phase of pregnancy are), try to take little catnaps during the day, get one of those neato full-body pregnancy pillows, or at least lots of pillows that you can shove between your legs and under your belly to support your awkward shape more comfortably."

10/29/08

flower power, my friend. Flower power...
Our appointment this morning was finally an encouraging one! First of all, we saw Rhonda who is the nurse that we saw early in our pregnancy when we had so many spotting scares. She was actually at our SPCC banquet this past Tuesday and it looks like she wants to get involved in Worth the Wait! But I digress. My weight, blood pressure, and urine results were all good. AND...without going into some of the gross details, she said that it looks like we could go into labor within the next week. She said that we'd need to schedule our weekly appointment, but that she honestly didn't think we'd make it until then. Of course, this was music to my ears - but I'm trying to not take those words as gospel truth. No need to set myself up for frustration in a week's time!
And yet... I can't help but be REALLY excited!
Really, really REALLY excited!
Baby Maurer is still dancing away in there. Shawn got to see him rolling around the other night, actually. He's seen him moving before, but the baby rolled back and forth for several good minutes! I suppose I'm used to it because it does it a few times throughout the day, so it was funny to see Shawn's amazed and slightly weirded out reaction. :) I can't blame him - it does make you wonder if maybe the baby will really come out as an alien or something. I'm still contracting away, but I don't even bother looking at the clock unless they're strong enough to make me sit down.
Sleeping is still frustratingly difficult for me. I'm getting about three or four hours of non-consecutive sleep a night. I know...it's great practice...but I think I'd rather be using this time to bank sleep and be well-rested for the chaos of labor. Oh well, there's not much I can do about it, so I'm just trying to be productive when I'm up in the wee hours of the night.
As somewhat of an aside, but still completely relative, I feel like I should warn you that I'm turning into a hippie...at least according to Shawn. Personally, I like to think I'm learning how to save money and be a wise steward of our finances...but it makes me laugh when Shawn calls me a hippie, nonetheless. :) It all started with cloth diapering, my friends, and the slippery slope hasn't stopped. We decided to cloth diaper primarily because of the financial savings, but also for the impact on the environment and the health of our baby (apparently babies are much less prone to diaper rash in cloth diapers). Then...I read that the best way to get a stain out of a cloth diaper is to put a little lemon juice on it and let it dry in the sun.
So of course, we needed a clothesline. Then I started thinking about how nice it would be to dry ALL of our clothes on the clothesline and to not have to run the dryer! I've only started doing this in the past two weeks, so I'm not sure how this is affecting our electricity bill, but hey...every penny counts! Not to mention again - great for the environment. For some reason, Shawn was really hung up (pun intended) on the thought of us having a clothesline in our backyard, so I was able to compromise and find one that retracts. Shawn installed it into the side of our house, and you just pull out this line and hook it into a hook that he drilled into a tree. Viola...instant clothesline! When you're finished, the line just reels back into the holder thing and nobody is the wiser.
So then, I started doing some research on the best kind of laundry detergent to use on cloth diapers since most scented detergents aren't good for babies. Guess what I found - a recipe to make your own laundry detergent. Completely toxin free, completely safe for babies, completely great for the environment (you don't have to buy and then throw out those plastic containers), and best of all - it's like 12 cents per load or something crazy cheap like that. I haven't actually done this yet - we just bought a huge thing of detergent that I want to use up first. But I will. Maybe I'll even wear a floor length skirt and a flower in my hair while I'm mixing it up.
So then I thought, "Woah. If you can make your own detergent that works as well as regular detergent, but is free of toxins...what other household products can you make?" I'll bet you were wondering the same thing, huh? Well, let me tell you...lots! It turns out that vinegar works just as well as any other kind of cleaning substance (even bleach, I've found) at cleaning pretty much any surface (i.e. dusting, toilet bowl, shower, etc.). It actually disinfects at the same time as cleaning. If you add baking soda to vinegar, it fizzes...much like scrubbing bubbles, and works WAY better than the bottle of Scrubbing Bubbles I usually use. While I haven't used it for this purpose, I've also read that vinegar can be used as a fabric softener, too. Oh yeah, and my Mom told me that it works better than bleach at whitening white laundry...from experience, that's true.
So there you have it - my confessions. During early pregnancy, I did a lot of research into what cleaning chemicals I wasn't supposed to be around, and it turned out that it was dangerous for me to inhale pretty much all of the cleaning agents we used. That fact, combined with doing research about caring for cloth diapers, led me to realize that there are a LOT of ways to clean and disinfect without toxins...especially important when having an infant around. The major bonus is that it really helps with our monthly budget, too!
I should also add that I still love me some Purell and we recently bought three large containers of Clorox disinfectant wipes to keep our diaper bag stocked. I'm absolutely not all about using ONLY "organic" cleaners. I just like learning new ways to do things just as well, but more cheaply. I promise, I wasn't like this growing up...or even in our early marriage. I seriously get excited...REALLY excited....when I discover something (like homemade laundry detergent) new to try. I like to think God's working in my heart and mind to transition me from being focused on convenience to being focused on frugality and health...
or I could just be a hippie.