hear ye, hear ye!

After much deliberation, stressing, number crunching, number throwing out the window, and most importantly - faith - Shawn C. and Jennifer S. Maurer have jointly decided that as of (approximately) June 1, 2010, Jennifer will become a full time stay at home Mom (i.e. - work from home Mom).

Shawn and I have been discussing and working towards me staying home since we were pregnant with Jude, and finally took the leap of faith a few months ago to officially tenure my resignation. Because my job's busy season falls in line with the school calendar, the best time for me to leave (for the sake of the ministry) is the end of May. Not to mention that we're not entirely sure how we're going to pull this off financially, so a few extra months to make cuts and build savings is nice.

I feel strongly that because Shawn's in ministry (thus requiring significantly more time/energy/stress/time/time/time...did I mention time?) than the typical 40 hour/week job, the ONLY way our family will remain healthy is if I stay home. Shawn's hours and schedule varies widely from day to day, and our children and family need stability. I also want to stay home so that I can be the primary person who cares for the home (laundry, dishes, vacuum, cooking, etc.). Right now, Shawn and I split those duties somewhere around 65/35, and I hate it. Shawn works really hard during his days (and sometimes nights) at work, and I wish that his time at home could be relaxing, quality time. At the moment, his time at home is spent helping me catch up on housework, and doing church work (since he keeps Jude on Mondays and Fridays so I can work in the office).

We're both stretched to what feels like our maximum capacity right now, with life only asking more and more of us. Something has to give, and it will NOT be our marriage, our family, or Shawn's ministry.

Instead, we've chosen to sacrifice a lot of luxuries we've enjoyed up until now - eating out, nice cell phone packages, remodels on the house, and many more things that we're still trying to figure out. Shawn and I both feel, however, that those sacrifices are well worth a loving marriage, kids who don't rebel because of absent parents, and a well rounded and effective ministry at Pinedale.

While we settled on this decision a few months ago, there is still a part of me that has mixed feelings about it. The career-driven woman in me feels a little insecure that my topics of conversation will revolve around poop and sleeping habits. The girl who grew up with very little money in me is afraid of financial instability and sad at not being able to buy frivolities for myself any longer. However, the wife in me knows that someone has to take care of my husband. Someone has to minister to him and his heart, so he can more effectively minister to others. The mother in me knows that there is no other healthy option for our family.

We're both looking forward to this transition in our lives, but we're also a little scared about how we're going to pull it off. I suppose we can look at this next step as an adventure. An adventure that holds a lot of uncertanities, fear, and hopefully faith - but an adventure that we'll be taking...together.