Sunday, December 12, 2010

letter to cohen

Dear Cohen,

Today, sweet boy you turned four months old. It's kind of crazy to think about how different our lives were just four months ago when we first saw you face to face. Your sweetness is growing with every passing day, and we're constantly getting remarks about how smiley you are.

In the past month it appears that you've developed reflux. You started getting more and more fussy with each passing day until the day we left for Texas, when you were just a hot mess. You had such a difficult time on the plane and were up every hour at night for our first couple of nights here. Certain that you had an ear infection, I insisted we take a trip to the pediatrician (thank goodness your Super Mom had already set up a pediatrician in Texas and had your files already transferred). It turns out that you were ear infection free. However, as soon as the doctor saw you spit up (it was curdled. and disgusting. and you get it on me at least three times a day. but i love you), and saw your ensuing fussiness, he determined reflux to be the cause. We tried Mylanta for a couple of days, but the real relief came when we asked for a prescription. You're now back to being my mellow, sweet Cohen who is happy as long as he has eye contact.

Because of that reflux you still hate tummy time, but you love to practice standing on your legs. You're also starting to get good at wanting to move your hands towards something and then actually doing it! You've rolled over a couple of times, but you're really more interested in developing those legs and arm/leg movements right now.

You and Jude are continuing to get along surprisingly well, and you two genuinely love each other. You get such a kick out of watching him bound around the house, and your face lights up when he comes near to hug you. Likewise, he loves to see you smile and loves watching you discover your feet. Daddy and I like to make you laugh (which you do with glee), and Jude gets such a kick out of just watching and giggling right along with us.

You took a little bit to adjust to life having some stability again, but I think you're finally getting there. I have you on a somewhat predictable schedule, and you actually slept from 9:45pm-7:30am last night. I'm praying with every fiber of my being that this continues.

I know this topic will be gross to adolescent-Cohen, but I don't care, it's important to me to document it. Nursing you is still going great, and you're still putting on weight and growing great. You have the cutest cankles, and are filling out your 3-6 month clothes so well. The doctor told me to cut out eggs from my diet for a bit to see if that helps with the fussiness, so I'm currently not eating dairy, not eating eggs, and have severely limited my caffeine. All for you, my sweetness. I really didn't think I could be dairy free, but it turns out that I can. In so many ways Cohen, you're teaching me that I'm stronger than I thought and capable of more than I could imagine. Thank you for that.

I have so much fun imagining what you're going to be like when you're grown up, and Daddy and I say all the time that we can't wait to hear what thoughts you have going on in your little head. You are so excited about interacting with people and you spend a great deal of time studying faces and facial expressions. You love to mimic my faces and noises, and your favorite game right now is when I mimic your little gurgles and shouts of glee. At the same time, you're very insistent on when you're ready for a nap, and sleep best in the peace and quiet of your own room. Your personality is so different than your big brother's, and we've had just as much fun discovering who you are and how God made you as we do with Jude.

We're undecided as to whether your personality takes after Mommy or Daddy, but there's no doubt whose traits won in the gene pool war. Cohen, you are the spitting image of your Daddy. If I ever wonder what your Daddy would look like in a onesie... all I have to do is look at you. I happen to be ecstatic about this fact, and am looking forward to you growing up to be handsome like your Dad. I hope you know though, that we won't compare you to him or to Jude. You're definitely your own person with unique gifts, passions, and vices.

We love you so much, Cohen. Your life is such a blessing to our family and you add so much joy to our home. Thank you for being my sweet, sweet Cohen bear.

Heavenly Father, You gave us such a gift when You gave us Cohen. Thank you for knowing what we needed better than we did. Lord, please guard him and protect him. Give us wisdom to parent him well - to see him how You see him, to guide him, and to love him. Teach us how to foster a loving relationship between him and Jude, and help us meet each of their needs individually. God, I pray that Cohen would feel Your presence and know that You have a plan for him. Put people in his life to direct Cohen back to You, to challenge him to draw closer to You, and to allow him to land softly when he fails. God, thank You for his life, thank You for giving us the privilege and honor of caring for that precious life that you so carefully crafted. I can't say it enough, Father. Thank You. It's in Your Son's name that I pray, Amen.

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